Dorian Tucker Helping Men Become Leaders

[Written by Stephen Wright]

After serving as a correction officer for 36 years, Dorian Tucker knew he had acquired sufficient knowledge to help at-risk young males in the community.

Mr Tucker, who rose to the rank of principal officer before retiring this year, gained a valuable insight into the male psyche of the inmates he encountered and related to some of the issues he believed had contributed to their incarnation.

The 58-year-old had no doubt there was a strong connection between young men involved in youth crime and growing up in fatherless homes.

“I started to realise some of these guys had the same yearning as me, and mine was to have my father in my life and to have confirmation of who I was as a man,” Tucker told Bernews.

“I learned that a high percentage of the guys in prison often didn’t have their fathers around and therefore lacked guidance.

“I’m not saying their moms didn’t do their best, but these men needed to know who they were as men, and sometimes a mother isn’t able to tell that to their sons.

“My father was an alcoholic, but he still went to work and was a functioning person. However, he couldn’t quite put it together in my eyes and give me what I needed.”

It was a destructive generational pattern Mr Tucker observed during the start of his career at Casemates and later on at Westgate.

“You go through your career, learning and watching,” he said. “I saw fathers come in at Casemates and later on watching their sons and grandsons come in at Westgate. There was a constant generational breakdown.

“I started to function differently as a corrections officer and tried to figure out how I could help.”

Mr Tucker, who has a son, a daughter, and seven grandchildren, was already teaching leadership skills to colleagues at Westgate and felt he could extend his teachings to help single mothers of sons.

“I wanted to help mothers raise their sons a little better,” he said. “I was receiving calls from single moms asking me to come and talk to their sons because they couldn’t get through to them. Most of the time, it was a case of they just needed to spend some time with their dad.

“I’d hear the story of fathers moving on, having children with someone else and starting a family, and their other son feeling left out. It’s a typical story, not only in Bermuda but all over.”

With the encouragement of his wife, Mr Tucker launched a three-day leadership workshop during the Covid-19 pandemic in 2020, titled Single Moms Raising Sons from a Male Perspective.

He reached out to Elaine Butterfield, then the director of the Women’s Resource Centre, who agreed for him to present via Zoom to more than 25 participants from Bermuda, the United States and the United Kingdom.

“It was an eye-opener for the single mothers,” he said. “Some would say, ‘When will you do something for the men? I have a brother, an uncle, who I would love to send to your workshops so they can hear what I’ve heard.”

The presentation was successful enough to run twice, and, after the pandemic, Mr Tucker started presenting in person and has since taken his talk to the Transformational Centre, the Family Centre, and the Adult Education Centre among others.

In August, he received his Certification in Speaking, Coaching and Leadership trainer from the John C Maxwell Leadership training programme in Orlando, Florida.

Earlier this month, Mr Tucker launched his second presentation for young men, Leaders Develop Leaders, at the Chamber of Commerce board room.

“You could tell they were engaged, and it was something they needed to hear and wanted to hear,” he added.

“Right now, I want to find a new venue, get more males out and run it again. I was overwhelmed by how much they wanted to hear what I was saying.”

Mr Tucker believes he has found his passion and purpose and hopes to reach a larger audience on the island.

“All that I learned as a correction officer, as a father, I’m using to help others,” he added. “I think it will help change our issues with gang and domestic violence.

“It will change a whole lot if we can get men to understand leadership and their role as men; however, it all starts with what happens in the home.”

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