Column: Standing On Your Own Two Feet
[Written by Carla Seely]
I grew up in a family founded on tough love. It was through this that independence was taught at a very early age; relying on oneself and not another was a value my parents instilled in both myself and my siblings. As a matter of fact, I can still clearly hear my father saying, “At the end of the day, you are born alone and you will die alone, and truly the only person you can ever rely on 100 percent is yourself.” These words may seem harsh – maybe even slightly cruel – but, to be perfectly honest they helped shaped who I am today; I am an independent woman with the financial capacity to stand on my own two feet.
Before we go any further, it’s important to note that I’m happily married and, from my perspective, I have no intent of changing that. However, of equal importance is that I know I don’t need to rely or depend on another person to support me financially. This gives me a sense of freedom and, contrary to belief, it isn’t all about who makes what; it’s about knowing that I have the core skillset to provide for myself, if it ever came down to that.
Now, in the not too distant past, it was believed that a man’s fundamental responsibility was to work and provide for his family while the woman stayed at home to look after the homestead and take care of the children. In those days, the wife would rely on her husband to provide the necessities such as a roof over their head, food on the table, and clothes on their backs, which were all driven by finances. In addition, although many dinner conversations between the husband and wife would involve talk about the two of them being a team, ultimately it was the man of the house who would have the final say – gosh, the Mad Men series sure comes to mind!
However, times have changed since then and, in this day and age, every woman should be able to financially provide for themselves or have the ability to do so should the need arise. It’s important to note that I’m not suggesting that all women need to work. However, I do strongly recommend that women should at least have the ability and skills to work and provide for themselves should it become necessary to do so – a backup plan for the what-ifs, so to speak.
Relying solely on another to provide the bare necessities can be dangerous in the long run, especially if things don’t work out or something unexpected happens. A great way to build your savings independently is through contributing into a pension plan, which is an easy way to help you save for your future. By making monthly pension contributions or additional voluntary contributions, it allows you to pave a path to secure your future – these pension savings are under your name and can be used to provide you with income in your retirement years. However, should something happen to you, listing your spouse as a beneficiary is something you should definitely consider as well.
In all reality, life may not be perfect and it may not always be in your control, but by creating the right foundation and making a couple of good decisions early on, it will definitely help you gain financial independence. Whether you’re finishing up university, married with children, divorced, widowed, single, or something else entirely, make sure you have the tools and skills you need to always be able to stand on your own two feet.
- Carla Seely is the COO at Freisenbruch. If you would like any further details, please contact cseely@fmgroup.bm or call 441 297 8686
